Garden Path Sentences

When writing, clarity is key. Yet some sentences can lead us down the garden path, so to speak. They seem to promise one idea but end up in another place, leaving us lost and confused. In writing circles, these missteps are known as garden path sentences.

Luckily, there are many ways to quickly fix these sentences, clearing up any confusion.

Examples of Garden Path Sentences

Where We Lose the Path

When we read, our brains analyze the words we see before we reach the end of a sentence. We make assumptions, expecting to find subjects, verbs, clauses, and so forth in certain places. When we don’t, our brains stumble. We have to reread the sentence–sometimes several times–to understand its meaning.

These garden path sentences tend to cause confusion in writing more than in spoken communication. That’s because we use other clues, like inflection and pauses, to clarify meaning while we speak. In writing, we need to rely on syntax and punctuation to keep our ideas straight.

Adding Assumed Words

Let’s take a closer look at the first example from the list above: Fat people eat accumulates. When you read that sentence, your brain likely interprets fat as an adjective describing people and people as the subject of the sentence. You think the sentence will be about what these people are doing, but it is not. Instead, fat is the subject of the sentence, while accumulates is the verb.

We could write: Fat accumulates. What fat? The fat that people eat. The that here is assumed in the original sentence. It’s better to write: The fat that people eat accumulates. Or: When people eat fat, it accumulates in their bodies.

When speaking, we would add pauses or stressed words to make up for leaving that out of the sentence. Often, we can be more clear by simply adding that to an implied clause. Here are a few examples:

• I convinced her children are noisy. Becomes: I convinced her that children are noisy.
• The horse raced past the barn fell. Becomes: The horse that raced past the barn fell.

Sometimes, a garden path sentence can benefit from a few corrections. Read this sentence: I told the girl the dog bit Jane would help her. Adding that would help: I told the girl the dog bit that Jane would help her. But the girl the dog bit is also awkward. It may be more clear to write: I told the girl bitten by the dog that Jane would help her.

Correcting Adjective Confusion

Garden path sentences can happen when we think we are adding clarity. Consider: We painted the wall with cracks. This sentence describes which wall was painted (the wall with cracks). But the structure tricks our brains into thinking we are painting something onto the wall. We expect to read something like: We painted the wall with purple paint. Or: We painted the wall with stripes. The description of the wall may be more clear if we use an adjective before the subject. As in: We painted the cracked wall.

Similarly, we can clarify another example sentence with a switch of two words. Notice what happens when you read: The man whistling tunes pianos. The structure is deceiving. The order of words makes us think that the man (subject) is whistling (verb) tunes (object), until we crash into pianos (an extra object). If we want it to be clear that the man (subject) whistling (adjective) tunes (verb) pianos (object), we should put the adjective before the subject: The whistling man tunes pianos.

Think about your meaning when editing a garden path sentence. Look at this example: The florist sent the flowers was flattered. On the first read, we likely think the florist (subject) sent (verb) the flowers (object). After reading the full sentence, we can see that sent the flowers is a phrase used to describe the florist. As in, the florist who was sent the flowers. Instead of describing the florist, we might write the idea another way: The florist was flattered when he received flowers.

Noun and Verb Confusion

As you can see, our brains often mistake an adjective for a verb. We can also make similar mistakes with words that can be nouns or verbs. Here is a very common example of a garden path sentence: The old man the boat. At first glance, we may not see a verb in this sentence. We think the subject is an old (adjective) man (noun) until we get to the boat without seeing a verb. However, man is the verb of this sentence. That becomes clear if we change the verb: The old operate the boat. Though, I don’t particular like the old as a subject. It sounds archaic, so I would be more likely to write something like: The old captain operates the boat. If that were appropriate for the meaning.

We also see noun/verb confusion in this example: The man who hunts ducks out on weekends. As we read, we assume this is about a man (subject) who hunts (verb) ducks (object), yet ducks is the verb of our sentence. Perhaps it’s a meant as a play on words (if he hunts ducks), but hunts ducks invites a question over which word is the verb. We could avoid confusion by writing, The hunter ducks out on weekends.

Catching Garden Path Sentences

When writing, it can be challenging to find garden path sentences in your own work because you already know what you are trying to say. Your brain uses that information to read your writing in a way that makes sense to you. But have you noticed what happens when you go back to something you wrote several days, or weeks, earlier? Some of the sentences that originally made sense might trip you up once the ideas behind them are not as fresh in your mind.

To catch garden path sentences and other convoluted writing, allow some time between writing and editing your work. Even better, get feedback from a friend or a professional editor. Ask them to point out any writing that is unclear, then reread those sections with fresh eyes.

Remember, writing is a craft. It takes practice. If you need help with grammar and syntax, sign up for a local writing class or look for online resources. I really like the Purdue Online Writing Lab (OWL). Spend some time practicing, and it will be easier to catch and correct your garden path sentences.